5 Reasons to Love/ Hate Lulu

Feb 07, 2013 at 1pm

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Lulu is a new "girls-only" app for sharing reviews of dudes anonymously. The lady-made social network launched two days ago for iOS and Android to a healthy amount of skepticism. Lulu reminds us that lots of people are already doing research on who is bankable/ bangable, but has me wondering how they can stop their app from turning into an online slam book? 

The app claims that it doesn't allow bashing and "Lulu isn't a place to trash-talk: Lulu's review system makes it impossible for a vindictive ex to reveal the size of a guy's itty bitty friend or claim he gave the Herp to 1,000 women." Basically, I call bullshit that Lulu will actually be able to control the crazies (like me) who will flock to it, but even if they could, I don't think anyone would care about it anymore. 

There is a horrible part of me that would probably have hate-sex with this app. It appeals to the voyeur in me, but I feel anxious about its consequences like reinforcing people's perceptions of how girls think. How long will it be until the opposite sex's version comes out? Or is that Bang with Friends? Will guys actually change their behavior based on how they're reviewed? And is it fair for people to have no control over their own reputation? All these unanswered questions are the reason why I had to make a list of my top five reasons to love/ hate this app.

1. People will be mean 

Hell hath no fury like a woman with an iPhone. Really though, volunteer bias is a thing. Ex-girlfriends or in my case ex-people-you-had-sex-with-but-made-very-clear-were-not-your-girlfriends might have perfectly legit reasons to ruin someone's life. Even with rules to play nice, don't underestimate my bitchiness. I'm passive aggressive enough to craft a comment along the lines of "he was so sweet and considerate of my time that he was always super quick in bed." 

2. No fact checking

This app makes it your word against mine about if Joe Schmo really did ask me to role play as iPhone Siri and say, "Your wish is my command." 

3. #AwkwardHashtags

Lulu uses hashtags that seriously test my faith in humanity. I don't care if he #WillSeeRomComs. And #AlwaysPays and #Big.Feet. are tacky even for me.

4. Shows the number of views

Lulu shows the number of times a bachelor has been viewed. So that's weird. This feels a lot like being forced to be on OkCupid and allows for that weird stock market style speculation that makes guys seem much hotter when other people want them.

5. Maybe your dating past shouldn't follow you forever.

I know you can't ignore people's pasts entirely, especially if they involve kids or wearing Crocs, but it seems unfair to hold a grudge for stuff dudes did before they even knew you. I don't know how much people really change, but they can at least stop wearing Crocs. 

It's nice to find out for yourself what someone is like, if for no other reason than that this app could make anyone look bad. What do you think: Is this super shallow or semi-useful?

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