FRIDAY FIVE
By Matt Charnock, Editor-in-Chief of The Bold Italic
As we opined in February: Going into 2022, one of our collective intentions was to consciously, and actively practice additional gratitude exercises that centered around living in San Francisco. For the most part, we’ve been quite good about honoring that intention. We’ve been engaging in more stair walks; we’ve found solace — albeit as temporary and ephemeral as it might be, given the state of everything — inside local, independently-owned bookstores; we’ve engaged in lots of queer, kink-positive, consensual sex.
However, there’s so much more to find appreciation for in the seven-by-seven In a city that boasts a population density of 18,850 people per square mile, there’s no shortage of sublime people and places to be grateful about.
Adding to our ongoing documented lists — “volumes,” if you will — of gratitude journal entries, we’re keen on waxing thankful for the more communal aspects of San Francisco living. There’s little wonder why SF is often synonymous with chosen families; it’s a city made up of queerdos, weirdos, and those whose corners never fit quite right elsewhere in the country, nation, or the world. But those jagged edges, more often than not, can find congruence within SF’s 49-square miles of ground soil sandwiched between saline waters.
It’s enspelling; we might venture to add that those meetings can feel holy happenstance; they can materialize everywhere and anywhere in this beloved city.
Sign up for The Bold Italic newsletter to get the best of the Bay Area in your inbox every week.
So here’s to you San Francisco, and your knack for entwining chosen families together. And here are five of our favorite ways of going about finding them.
Bookstore babes, ftw
San Francisco’s a bastion for bookshops (and libraries, both City-operated and community-helmed on sidewalks). On any given day, there’s an author reading or other bibliophilic event held at a beloved local bookstore — we’re gesturing toward you, Green Apple Books and Booksmith — that entices readers to commune with other like-minded folks. Pick up a used book and a new friend, simultaneously. Multitasking in this economy is extremely welcomed.
Car-free corridors and spontaneous conversations
The pandemic’s afforded a resurgence of al fresco dining and reintroduced the notion of making our city streets more pedestrian-friendly. San Francisco’s twenty-plus car-free corridors have grown into kinetic community centers, in and of themselves. (I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve been thrown a kind smile, a warm wave, or saccharin “hello!” while walking Slow Page Street on a Saturday afternoon; I actually made a new IRL writer friend by way of trudging along the street — each of us pointing at the other as to convey that “hey, I know you from Gay Journalism Twitter!”) You simply can’t go wrong combing a car-free JFK Drive and taking out your AirPods to notice the friendly bipeds around you.
Coworking vibes for low-key
The seven-by-seven is frequently accredited for helping coworking, as well as the micro-economy around it, enter into mainstream discourse. That said: We can all agree that W*W*rk really isn’t ~that girl,~ anymore — which is all the more excuse to check out a less corporatized community workspace. Thankfully, SF has a slew of them to visit and cozy up (with complimentary coffee) to a fellow WFH comrade.
Nightclub debaucheries that grow into cherished kikis
Any night spent putting back drinks at the city’s numerous queer bars and venues — most of which still are addressed in the Castro and SoMa — is one spent well, dancing under strung Christmas lights and soundtracked by house music. These evenings are only elevated when those mid-shelf alcohols are sponged up by carbohydrates ordered at late-night eateries like Orphan Andy’s. Maybe there, too, is a v cute boy or girl or non-binary royalty to either your left or right, snuggled up to your should as they, too, try to sober up with an order of fries.
Bbs met on mental health days taken to explore the city
Even though we’re fortunate enough to live in the best city in the world, life inside of it and all around it is demanding — exhausting, draining, and at times demoralizing. That’s what afternoons exploring the Japanese Tea Garden are for: disengaging from this omnipresent detritus and finding still moments of appreciation for what you have right in front of you, which may turn out to be a kindredship in the making.