At what point did it becomeOK to be a Russian spy? I was raised long ago in the 1980s, and back then, it was sooooooo not OK to be a Russian spy. Like, every movie and most books made the Russian-spy thing seem likethepolitical third rail. In those days, it was totally kosher to assassinate Central American socialists or run guns to America-hating jihadists. But for cripesakes, don’t you dare spy for Russia. That’s just how we did things then!
I read a lot of news and listen to a lot of podcasts, so I’m surprised I missed the tipping point when it became no big deal to be a Russian secret agent. Googling it now, I can’t seem to find anything that explains when and how this cultural shift happened. Yes, I have noticed that there are not so many movies with Russian spies anymore. The last one I saw was Salt, with Angelina Jolie. That was pretty cool. Those Russians were bad hombres! If you haven’t seen it — spoiler alert! — they try to nuke everything and destroy America. But then it gets complicated, and in the end, they don’t.
But seriously, that’s the kind of movie that used to happen all the time back when there wasn’t a lot of mushiness around the whole being-a-Russian-spy thing. Now not so many movies are like that. (I have read about the TV show The Americans. I haven’t seen it, but I think that that one makes Russian spies look cool and sexy, so maybe that has something to do with all this?)
I even went to Moscow a few years back. And you’d think, what with all this spying going on, that they’d have seduced or bribed or blackmailed me or whatever it is they do to draft you into their service. But nothing!
The thing I’m really confused about is why we haven’t heard a peep from Clint Eastwood. That’s a guy you used to be able to count on to go to bat against Russian spies. Did you ever see Firefox? HOLY CRAP, that was an AWESOME movie, and Clint really stuck it to the Russians. Sadly, I think the last time anyone heard from him was that whole weird incident with the chair at the 2012 Republican Convention. But regardless, the Clint Eastwood I used to know would be kicking some Russian-agent ass.
I even went to Moscow a few years back. And you’d think, what with all this spying going on, that they’d have seduced or bribed or blackmailed me or whatever it is they do to draft you into their service. But nothing! Not even one sexy double agent nibbling on my ear and slipping microfiche into my tattered copy of The Master and Margarita.
I’m starting to think I might be the only one who is not a Russian spy. It’s a funny feeling, because I used to feel like the only person who thought it might not be the best thing that the USA is the one that is running the world and has all the power. That wasn’t a popular thing to think!
But now that USA is ALL RUSSIAN SPIES ALL THE TIME and totally getting played by everyone, maybe that’s not such a great thing either? Maybe I should have shut up with my stupid thoughts.
I know Russia is the last great racist, Islamophobic, homophobic, anti-Semitic, predominantly “white” country. “Keepin’ it real,” as Jeff Sessions and Steve Bannon like to say. But still, is that reason enough to go back on our proud heritage of hating Russian spies? Can’t we be racist, multiphobic, etcetera, and ALSO hate Russia? Those were the good ol’ days.
