This is not a judgmental space. Sure, living the fast life as a young, carefree, actor/artist/catch-all creative, sprinting from one Tinder date to the next, can be thrilling. But there’s also something to be said about consuming food that isn’t infused with marijuana every once in a while. Has that “settle down” bug come for you yet? A test:

Was your biggest struggle this weekend a bouncing magic castle at a kid’s birthday party in Menlo Park…

At Least You Get to Sleep In

“You are somehow all sitting in a circle of Restoration Hardware couches and chairs in Menlo Park. The kids are watching each other. They look only moderately happy. One of them threw up on the couch earlier. The couples surround you and ask you about Tinder. Can they look at your phone? They are going to find the one for you. Your future is in the hands of unhappy, self-medicating suburbanites.” Read more…

…or stringing your words together over a buffet of gourmet edibles?

I Ate Eight Courses of Cannabis-Infused Haute Cuisine, and It Only Made Me More Hungry

“By the fifth course, I am, indeed, high off my ass. I try to work out the math behind how many little plates these chefs are assembling. “Eight courses times 30 guests equals a lot of plates” is about as far as I get. I try to eat the fifth-course oyster, but instead of sliding into my mouth, it slaps me in the face.” Read more…

Is your biggest fear at work losing that Silicon Valley–size paycheck, pension and health-care plan…

Silicon Valley’s Outsourcing Addiction

“Silicon Valley would be particularly impacted by any changes to the program, because tech workers received nearly two-thirds of H-1B visas in 2014. But why is this program in the crosshairs of Trump’s fascistic administration? Because instead of using the visa to recruit skilled workers from outside the United States, it has far more often been used to bring in foreign workers to replace domestic workers.” Read more…

…or being thrown offstage by a mob of angry audience members (all the more scary because you don’t, in fact, have a health-care plan)?

Local Actors and Comedians Reveal Their Most Embarrassing Onstage Moments

“I knew I was going to bomb as soon as I started my first joke onstage. First minute of my set: complete silence in the entire stadium. You could hear the cars driving on the road a mile away. Within two minutes of my set, people started booing to get me off the stage. I’ve never been booed by so many people in my life. As humiliating as that experience was, I am so grateful it happened. My skin got so damn thick after that.” Read more…