As we know, big tech bosses are slowly but surely taking over the world Mission. Mark Zuckerberg, king of the Book of Faces, bought a Dolores Heights mansion with his wife and has spent the past year and a half remodeling it to fit his vision. The 5,542 sq. ft. manse has been undergoing massive renovations and will ultimately cost a tidy $1.6 million on top of the $10 mil the couple paid for it. We recently got an exclusive look into the inside of Marky Zuck’s pad and here’s what we saw:
This is the Zuckerberg strategy room office where he goes to plan the expansion of his empire. Note the tiny hospital figurine. We’re not sure why there are dragons on the table.
This is a room Zuckerberg uses to relax and listen to music. He likes to take a chance on hearing new bands here. He calls this room “My Space.”
The food in this kitchen is updated when you least expect it. One day everything is vegan, and once you get used to that — BAM — it’s all charcuterie all the time. You like having Dino Nuggets in the fridge? Too bad, there are only bagel bites. And sometimes things get switched around from one month to the next so you can never find anything. Visitors to the house bitch about these changes at first but eventually get used to them.
One wing of this mansion is devoted to the display of friends’ baby pictures in various stages of development. Here’s one of this baby pooping, here’s one of this baby in a wagon — oh, and here’s one of a baby propped up on another baby. Zuckerberg admits this is kind of an annoying thing to have to see every day, but it came with the house.
This is Mark’s mother’s room. She’s mostly blocked off from and not allowed to see some parts of the house. She insisted Mark let her be here, though, so she can check in, and every now and then she comes out to say something judgy.
The Zuckerbergs have an extensive garden where many fruits and veggies grow and they also house livestock. The patch of land is cared for by a rotating lineup of their most annoying friends who are constantly asking Mark to chip in for supplies and to tend the plants with them. One night Mark got drunk and accidentally invested a bunch of cash into this garden and he has been bitter about it ever since.
This is the entertainment center of the mansion. It’s expansive and has a lot of options for your viewing pleasure. The only snag is that the movies start playing as soon as you walk past them, even if you run by really quickly. On his way through this room, Mark usually makes a mental note to come back when he’s done with his work, but sometimes he just forgets to come back altogether. This room is also full of cats.
