What is EYES + EDGE, you ask? Some days a lifestyle, some days the best damn job ever, some days a cluster f@#k. But let’s get to the technical terms. We are a lifestyle publication that also functions as a marketing and events company dedicated to all things Portland. We love this quirky city and the people who live here. Because of this overwhelming appreciation for Portland, we felt the need to create a platform to spread the love. We feature stories on artists, designers, retailers, small businesses, and urban goats. Yes, goats.
Our E+E team consists ironically of transplants who were all drawn to Portland for numerous reasons. Some of the reasons are obvious — the nature, the low cost of living, the city’s overall love of booze — others are a bit more difficult to explain, but we’re gonna’ try! We’ve listed our top 10 quirky, bizarrely inspiring, and sometimes off-putting Portland-specific places for you to experience.
Vegan Mini-Mall
Yup, there’s a strip of businesses right in the Belmont District on SE Stark that are all 100 percent vegan. Each and every one of them. We like to start out at Sweetpea Baking Company, preferably on a Saturday (doughnut day) and grab a soy latte to accompany our sweet treats. Next up is Herbivore Clothing, so we can buy an assortment of cruelty-free tees that say “Bacon had a mom” and “Wings are for flying not for frying.” Moving right along, we stop into Food Fight!, a vegan convenience store of sorts, to pick up some soy curls and Sir Richard’s vegan condoms. If we’re feeling particularly brave that day, we’ll head next door to Scapegoat Tattoo Co., a vegan owned and operated tattoo shop where we can get “I HEART KALE” tattooed on our asses. And though it is not officially included in the mini-mall, just a block down the road is the vegan Salon 13, where we can get our roots touched up guilt-free.
Note: No animals were harmed in the writing of this paragraph.
The Green Microgym
Almost everything in Portland revolves around food and alcohol. Other than the walking we do between drinking establishments on bar crawls, how do we maintain our figures? We hit up the gym! But not just any gym: The Green Microgym, where we sweat it out on iPad-equipped ellipticals with eco fitness trainers. While we’re burning off last night’s pizza and microbrews, we’re also generating electricity that is stored and used to power the rest of the building. You’re welcome, Mother Earth. Lucky for you guys, this gym is conveniently located in three different areas around PDX — NE Alberta, SE, and Sellwood.
Cascade Brewing Barrel House
Portland is a mecca for beer and wine lovers alike, but the Cascade Brewing Barrel House marries the two seamlessly with its unique sour beers. The beers are aged in oak barrels that once housed port, wine, and sherry, and are combined with local fresh fruit and spices to create an orgy of flavors for your palate. We’ve tried a handful of sours and they are all fucking delicious. Go try Portland’s funkiest alcoholic beverages in the SE Buckman neighborhood. You’ll love ’em, we promise.
Rimsky-Korsakoffee + Café au Play
Let’s face it, there’s no shortage of coffee beans in this city. If we’re looking for places that stand out with local favor, Rimsky-Korsakoffee House on SE 12th Ave. and Café au Play on SE Division come to mind. Eerily eclectic, Rimsky’s scares the livin’ daylight out of us (in a good way, naturally) with a coffin in the bathroom and tables that rotate on their own. Café au Play is easily the less frightening of the two; it serves as a nonprofit coffeehouse for the community and is stocked with volunteer baristas. Come to ogle, gobble down the Rasputin’s Vice (a melting pot of raspberries, Bailey’s ice cream, and chocolate) at Rimsky’s, and leave enriched by eccentric coffeehouse culture.
Bula Kava House
We recently tried kava this year in Richmond neighborhood’s Bula Kava House and have become huge fans. Kava’s a drink that comes from the root of piper methysticum, a close relative to the black pepper plant. It was first domesticated in Vanuatu and is commonly used in Micronesia, Melanesia, and Polynesia. The root is soaked in water, stirred, and then the liquid is extracted with a juice press. Lately this has also become an alluring alternative for other social beverages. BKH offers four different types of kava on a daily basis, each with a different physiological effect (some promising euphoria, others providing a boost of energy). According to Judd Rench, scuba dive instructor turned kava bar owner, kava can chase away bad spirits. We can dig that.
Montage
E+E goes to Montage on SE Morrison for a variety of reasons: (1) Yummy, gooey spicy mac ’n’ cheese; (2) to trick our visitors (poor bastards) into eating gator tail or frog legs; (3) tinfoil leftovers. Not just any tinfoil leftovers, ladies and gents. We deliberately leave a few morsels on our plate just so the waiter will come back with a shiny, metallic, sculptural masterpiece (so far we’ve been honored with a crab and palm tree but we’re hoping for a squirrel). These ain’t your average swan leftovers. The atmosphere is worth noting. A large macaroni-ed rendition of The Last Supper hangs in the background while diners sit communally and cooks yell from the kitchen.
She Bop
She Bop, a women-owned adult boutique off North Mississippi Ave., provides Portlanders with eco-friendly sex toys, organic lubricants, and an array of books and DVDs that cater to all genders and sexual orientations. This isn’t a dingy sex shop hidden in a dark alley. She Bop embraces and celebrates sex, giving everyone the tools to take charge of their sexual health and fantasties.
Our favorite part about She Bop are the educational classes. These aren’t your 5th grade sex ed classes. Learn how to give a better BJ, get the 411 about S&M, and even attend a fundraising event for Bitch Media. Whatever you do, check out “I Rub My Duckie.” You can thank us later.
ROOM 529
Room 529 might sound like the title of a Stephen King novel, but it’s not. This new Portland project came about when Matt Schulte had an epiphany that any city of cultural import worldwide has, or once had, a hotel that was emblematic of the creative energy of its time and place. He approached Hotel Modera in downtown Portland about creating a collaborative space in a room, and to his surprise they gave him their biggest suite and a key, and he now has 24/7 access to making magic happen in Room 529. Creative magic, people, not the more commonly known “magic” that occurs in hotel rooms. Geez. So far, short films, interviews (Wim Wenders, being one to name), parties, photo shoots, music videos, and live performances have all taken place and been captured on video for a soon-to-be-launched channel on the hotel’s circuit TV system, Channel 529.
Sugar Me
There’s no sugarcoating it (pun intended). Hair removal is a bitch. The “sugaristas” at Sugar Me sweeten the experience by offering an alternative to waxing or shaving. Sugaring — made simply of sugar, lemon, and water — is the most natural form of hair removal available. The mixture is heated to your body’s natural temperature, then removed in the direction of the hair growth, leaving sensitive skin safe from ingrown hairs and breakage. We can attest to this, as we’ve jumped on our bikes to ride home immediately after a “sugar” and had no problems, if you know what we mean. Head up to Sugar Me in the NE area and have your hair removal and eat it too (the sugar mixture, not your hair). Why would you go anywhere else to get your pubes ripped off?
Casa Diablo Vegan Strip Club
Everything in Portland comes with a vegan alternative. Even our strip clubs. E+E went to Casa Diablo in the NW, the vegan-friendly strip club, where only $2 bills are provided. “Two’s are twice the party and twice the fun!” yelled the bartender. Surrounded by vegan sloppy joes, bartenders with batman-like utility belts full of cigarettes for sale, and the woman at the door offering up motorboat action for a mere $3, we knew only Portland could foster a place as special as a vegan strip club. A raffle starts after 8:30 p.m. You might get seriously lucky by winning one of the free lap dances — given away every hour till closing.
Photos by Rob Lewis
