It ’s that special time of year when everyone you know suddenly becomes a political pundit, your phone dings non-stop with hot takes, and you’re somehow expected to be all-in, too. Well I already voted, and now I’d like to stick my head in the sand on Election Day rather than hear one more word about swing states.
Personally I plan to sew glass beads on some eccentric apparel while my friend and I binge-watch Project Runway reruns. If that’s not your cup of tea, here are some places to get really fucking drunk. And don’t worry if you’re actually politically passionate — I found some election parties for you, too.
Want to stick your head in the sand?
These are my educated guesses where results won’t be blaring on a nearby TV.
The Hideout at Dalva — Mission
3121 16th St., San Francisco, CA 94110
Website
Hidden behind Dalva in Mission, The Hideout lives up to its name as a place to escape the noise. With a low-key vibe, no screens, and a speakeasy feel, this spot is for those looking to disappear into a perfectly crafted cocktail while the rest of the city stresses over exit polls. It’s dark, quiet, and exactly what you need on Election Night.
Moongate Lounge — Chinatown
28 Waverly Pl., San Francisco, CA 94108
It’s the top floor above Mr. Jiu’s
Website
Need an upscale escape? Moongate Lounge is all about serenity. Above Mister Jiu’s, this intimate, sophisticated space offers beautifully crafted drinks without the distraction of election chatter or TVs. It’s perfect if you want to sip a cocktail and feel like you’ve left the world and the election behind.
Smuggler’s Cove — Hayes Valley
650 Gough St., San Francisco CA 94102
Website
Smuggler’s Cove is your tropical refuge. This tiki bar serves some of the strongest rum cocktails in the city, and the only drama you’ll experience is deciding between a Mai Tai or a Zombie. By the time you finish one of their potent concoctions, you’ll be sailing away from any memory of election night.
And it’s actually Funk Week right now? Apparently our swashbucklers in Hayes Valley are celebrating Jamaican Rum from November 3rd to the 9th.
Zeitgeist — Mission
199 Valencia St., San Francisco, California 94103
Website
Beer garden, punk rock, and no political bullshit — that’s Zeitgeist. If you want to drink outside, surrounded by people who are too busy enjoying a pitcher of beer to care about the state of the union, this Mission spot is your go-to. Sit under the stars with a cold drink in hand and forget the political chaos unfolding elsewhere.
Okay, but are you addicted to politics?
Here are some election parties for you.
Manny’s — Mission
3092 16th St., San Francisco, CA 94103
Election night event
If you’re someone who needs to be in the thick of things, Manny’s is where you want to be. This civic engagement hub will be hosting a lively election night watch party, complete with big screens showing the results, themed cocktails, and a room full of people who live for this stuff.
I saw also online that it’s a block party. So you’ll be surrounded by political junkies cheering or groaning at every poll update, but hey — at least the drinks are good.
Curio Bar at The Chapel — Mission
775 Valencia St., San Francisco, CA 94110
Election party details
The Chapel is more than just a music venue — it’s also the perfect place for a big-screen election watch party. On Election Night, its Curio Bar becomes place becomes a hub for politically engaged San Franciscans who want to see the results unfold in real time. With a full bar and a crowd ready to react to every twist and turn, this is where you go if you want to experience all the highs and lows of democracy with a drink in hand.
Kezar Pub — Cole Valley
770 Stanyan St., San Francisco, CA 94117
Instagram
If you want a sports bar vibe for your election watch party, Kezar Pub is the place. I actually didn’t see a party listing online but they did host the SF Republicans for this year’s debate. So — uh — if that’s your vibe in the country’s most progressive city, who am I to stop you?
With TVs lining the walls and a crowd that’s ready to cheer (or curse) at every result, you’ll be in the heart of the action. The beer is flowing, the energy is high, and it’s like watching the Super Bowl, but with way more anxiety.
The Function — Financial District
1723 Polk St., San Francisco, CA 94109
Election party details
The Function is one of the newer spots on the block, but it’s quickly becoming known for its lively events and happy hour specials. On Election Night, they’ll be throwing a watch party with drink deals and results streaming on every screen. It’s a great spot to grab a cheap drink and commiserate (or celebrate) with fellow voters.
Saul Sugarman is editor in chief of The Bold Italic.
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