One of the great things about living in San Francisco — especially the Mission — is that people really care about stuff. From social causes to dinner options, we take things seriously serious. Especially burritos. Debates about burritos have the power to bring new friends together and tear the most devoted loved ones apart. Basically, we have stronger feelings about Mission-style burritos than we do about presidential elections. This is how I like my burrito:
I used to date a girl who’d say, “Easy on the rice,” and it would bum me out. Give me however much rice you want to give me. However much of everything. Just don’t skimp on the guac.
I’m all about wetness, as long as it doesn’t make too much of a mess. Whether it comes from bean juice, salsa juice, or runny crema, it makes no difference to me, as long as the rice ain’t dry and the tortilla begins to soak through by the time I get to the end.
I like to get steaming-hot
rice, beans, and cheese in
one bite and cool guac, sour
cream, and salsa in another.
A mouthful of yin here, a big
bite of yang there.
I usually go veggie, though
I have no shortage of appreciation for the grilled meats at La Taqueria and the stewed lengua at Cancún (preferably at 2:15 a.m. for extra stewiness).
I always get refried beans.
Some people think black beans taste better or something.
Weird. Refried beans are
the only beans.
I specify “a little bit of mild”
for the texture and “a little
bit of hot” for the flavor and heat. Then while I’m eating, I squirt green salsa on each bite.
(La Taqueria and Cancún
do it right.)
As long as it’s not spinach
green or sundried-tomato
red, I’m happy.
My burrito needs to be
wrapped nice and tight,
or else it gets messy.
Messiness hinders efficiency,
and I like to eat my burrito
as efficiently as possible.
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
This story originally ran in Volume 4 of The Bold Italic magazine — Obsessions — which is available for purchase as a single issue or with a subscription.
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
In Our Shop: The Burrito Body Pillow
Make it super! For the die-hard enthusiast, now you can have your burrito and spoon it, too. This burrito is a one-of-a-kind soft sculpture, handmade exclusively for The Bold Italic by Lauren Venell, the plush artist behind the Sweet Meats and Deep Creeps toy lines. Standing as tall as a beefy second-grader, this burrito makes an excellent body pillow or imaginary friend, who will never judge you for scarfing the half you were going to save for dinner even though you’re already full.
Get it in our Shop.
Designer: Lauren Venell
$450
