Wysdym Yrth is a deliberately founded, intentionally minded, socially radical, sustainably karmic community with two (2!) currently available rooms.
The rooms:
Both are single occupancy only (sorry!). The first room, the attic, boasts an intact floor, roofing on two sides, and south-facing glassless windows for $700 a month. The second room is a studio — a cozy 5 x 3 space located beneath the attic stairs for $400 a month. We also have a 1974 Chevy Nova parked in the garden, the trunk of which will be available for sublease in June. Utilities run $20–$30 a month.
The home:
Our home is a three-story Victorian with five bedrooms, two baths, a kitchen, dining room, common area, garden, and dungeon.We have water, electricity, gas, wifi, and the just comfort of the righteous.What we DON’T have at Wysdym Yrth is a television, a radio, a microwave, doors, or passive-aggressive communication, vis-à-vis “notes.” Any household disagreement must first be submitted via email to the house mediator to be put on the docket for regularly scheduled mediation, which takes place on the last Tuesday of every month (excluding August).
Our intentional community is fragrance-free. We do not allow scented candles, oils, detergents, soaps, lotions, perfumes, deodorants, shampoos, gels, lubricants, or foods.
Our household does not support products that have been tested.
We doubt that our home would be a good fit for those who indulge in the occasional recreational use of hard drugs, prescription pharmaceuticals, alcohol, aspirin, or bread.
We do not promote consumerism, negativism, positivism, homophonia, slut shaming, or sham slutting. We are a diverse and inclusive house. We love all people who share our values, and gladly accept any who can prove themselves against our arbitrary yet unforgiving standards.
We love animal companions, though due to a landlord agreement cannot allow any more into our home (sorry!). Our house currently hosts two of our earth relatives. Daryl is an easygoing barrel cactus, needing only an occasional watering. Gaia is an 8-foot-long monitor lizard who enjoys sunshine, fresh air, and ambush, though now that she has laid eggs in the trunk of the Nova, she primarily stays outside.
All individuals brought into Wysdym Yrth are expected to participate in house chores, including but not limited to cooking, weeding, house laundry, watering, sweeping, and whipping.
Altogether we form a low-frills, laid-back community bound together by a rigorous and legally binding blood oath.
We often host spontaneous get-togethers, art parties, fire dances, political rallies, knife fights, and other spirited challenges to outdated social mores like “decency,” “restraint,” and “public safety.” You need not attend every household event, but must be OK with the possibility that at any day, at any hour, in any room, including yours, any of the above could happen. Attendance is only casually mandatory — though absence may be severely punished! :)
About us:
- Lana is a female-bodied atmospherist.
- Trudeau is a male-bodied, gender-fluid, filmmaking radical snacktivist.
- Robyn is a female-bodied former Navy SEAL, escaped inmate of a Soviet prison camp, and corporate headhunter with the taxidermy to prove it.
- Rū does not believe in labels, pronouns, adverbs, or prepositions.
Altogether we form a low-frills, laid-back community bound together by a rigorous and legally binding blood oath.
About you:
Applicants should be easygoing individuals. We’re not looking for someone exactly like us — just someone we can like (shall we say a fellow conspirator?) who also knows how to cook, juice, render a steer into soap, non-lethally restrain a monitor lizard, and has a strict attention to cleanliness, a Spartan daily regimen, a contempt for dissent, and less than 4 percent body fat. S/He should be prepared to have a quarter bounced off them at any moment. We will be testing.
A degree is not necessary. The school of life is enough. A complete list of all your friends, with contact information, beginning from earliest memory, is, however, non-negotiable. Applicants who can count more than five close acquaintances are discouraged from applying, as prolonged absence may raise suspicion.
Sound good? Please respond to this ad with a detailed message about yourself, including name, social security number, blood type, five letters of recommendation, and a description how Wysdym Yrth fits into your 75-year plan. If we are interested in pursuing your application, we will contact you with details about our upcoming open house and to schedule an intensive 4-day break-down interview. All invitees are encouraged to come wearing form-fitting clothing, comfortable trail runners, and contact info for next of kin.
Can’t wait to meet you! :)
[A version of this article was originally published on Craigslist and republished by California Magazine.]
