If you’re like me, you feel frustrated by how people chalk up the romantic-comedy genre to a form of wish fulfillment. That may be the case for some places, but Bay Area residents live in the birthplace of Apple and Twitter. The entrepreneurial spirit is in the air we breathe. We have the power to make our romantic wishes come true and stop lamenting over Tinder’s slim pickings. Putting on my Nora Ephron snapback hat, I curated a list of the best Bay Area locations for rom-com-inspired gestures and threw in some tips to ensure your plans are foolproof.
Moe’s Books
If Notting Hill and You’ve Got Mail have taught us anything, it’s that meet cutes happen only in bookstores. Try your luck at Moe’s Books. Following Hugh Grant’s cue, plant yourself in the travel section on the second floor because travel books are dreamy. Keep some book recommendations up your sleeve, such as Jack Kerouac’s On the Road or Dr. Seuss’s literary masterpiece, Oh, the Places You’ll Go! You can test the waters with these recs when you see an attractive, meandering customer, preferably an American superstar in a poor disguise. If that doesn’t work, clear out your savings for a $73 first-edition kids’ book to use as an ice-breaker when you wait in line to pay.
A Bench in Dolores Park
A bench is a staple prop for falling-in-love montages and moments when the white male protagonist realizes the meaning of love, according to La La Land and 500 Days of Summer. Instead of a beautiful portrait of Los Angeles, you’ll find a lovely view of San Francisco from a bench at Dolores Park. As a caveat, both parties must wear retro ’50s-inspired outfits to ensure that the magic bench works—no North Face fleeces or FiveFinger shoes allowed. Don’t mind the wandering stoners.
Your Not-Single Techie Friend’s Fancy Loft
Remember in Bridget Jones’s Diary when Bridget is the only singleton at a dinner party? You can re-create her experience by finally accepting an invitation to your not-single tech friend’s ritzy adult dinner party. Recite depressing facts about modern romance as you admire their expensive Williams-Sonoma kitchenware and seethe at the relationships around you. Bonus points if there’s a curmudgeonly and devastatingly handsome human-rights lawyer present. If not, settle for a curmudgeonly and devastatingly handsome web developer. Make coy eye contact with him until he admits that he likes you just as you are, then dash into your Uber.
A BART Station
According to Sandra Bullock’s While You Were Sleeping, public transportation can be the perfect place for romance to bloom. On an early December morning, hang around the BART station and heroically rescue someone who has fallen into a coma after tripping over the yellow safety line. Take them to the hospital and inadvertently say that you were going to marry them while you’re in daydream mode. While they’re in a coma state, you can take time to meet their family, who will unwittingly accept that you’re their child’s fiancé throughout this comedy of errors. Accidentally fall in love with their dreamy, gruff brother. If the stranger wakes up, you’re guaranteed to be riding the BART into the sunset of south Fremont for your honeymoon.
Art Murmur Gallery in Oakland
Strong, independent women in romantic comedies work as curators at art galleries and museums, like Kristen Bell in When in Rome and Michelle Monaghan in Made of Honor. That, or journalists at a newspaper. Since there aren’t really newspapers in the Bay Area, becoming a curator at an Oakland art gallery will do. Like Michelle Monaghan, vaguely jet-set to a foreign European country for your job and find love. If you return to America with two hot male leads from Grey’s Anatomy vying for your love, you’ve mastered the setup.
Union Square
At Washington Square, Harry Burns realized his love for Sally Albright in one of cinema’s most iconic rom-com scenes. For hopeless romantics in the Bay Area, Union Square is the perfect equivalent. On New Year’s Eve, frantically cut through the crowds of people waiting for fireworks so you can get to the Girl of Your Dreams, who’s secretly waiting for you at a party. Dammit, you need to declare your love for her now! But if your Postmates habit and poorly built clearance sneakers from Nordstrom Rack have got you down, that’s OK too. Just go back to your apartment, order more Postmates, and sad-watch When Harry Met Sally until you fall asleep to a drunk dude wailing “Auld Lang Syne.”
Hey! The Bold Italic recently launched a podcast, This Is Your Life in Silicon Valley. Check out the full season or listen to the episode below featuring Alexia Tsotsis, former co-editor of TechCrunch. More coming soon, so stay tuned!
