In this series, we highlight some of our favorite recent job posts on Craigslist. If you have seen or, even better, responded to any interesting posts recently, please comment below!
At long last, it’s summertime. The San Francisco fog hasn’t slowed up one bit, and neither has the deluge of weird and/or creepy job listings from all kinds of choice individuals on the CL.
I can’t help but think that posts like these exist because they actually get replies. Or maybe the people posting them just keep doing it, hoping that someday it will work.
Gamecube Championship XIII
What: This isn’t so much a job as a challenge, but it was in the jobs section of CL, presumably because it will require much work to succeed. NBA Street Vol. 2, a game that was released over 13 years ago, has a self-proclaimed champion who’s offering a whopping $40 to anyone who can defeat them.
The Good: From what I remember, which was playing this game while inebriated in a college dorm, it’s really fun.
The Bad: You will probably lose. No one declares a challenge like this without some serious heat ready to go.
Work Your Way to the Playa
What: The most Bay Area thing I’ve ever seen. If you’re an LED technician, this group of Burners needs someone to change out the lights on their “2 story mutant vehicle,” and you will be paid in the form of a ticket to the Great Festival itself.
The Good: You’ll get to work on a “demonic Timemachine from Hell!!!” Also, those tickets go for a lot of money, so at least the compensation is valuable.
The Bad: Burning Man
A Job
What: That’s such a brief title for such a long list of requirements. “Submissive, Exotic Personal Assistant to run or assist my home/office in Manhattan New York.” And what does that entail? Administrative tasks, travel, sales, cooking, cleaning, marketing—oh, and if you’re good at web design or graphic design, that’s a plus.
The Good: Per the title of the post, it’s a job.
The Bad: Don’t miss that line about “occasional stress release” or the one that says “I NEED A DO IT ALL KIND OF ASSistant.” Also, if you have even half of the skills listed in this post, you are a badass and can run your own business.
So That’s the Going Rate
What: If you’re a college girl with nice legs and feet, this guy will pay you $65 to “watch tv while I j/o …”
The Good: It’s an easy gig, and you get to watch TV. $65 ain’t so bad for what I assume is less than ten minutes of “work.” Make sure he pays you up front, and do it electronically so you don’t have to touch anything he’s touched.
The Bad: You have to be a college girl. What about other ladies with nice legs and feet? A creeper on this level might actually ask to see your student ID.
Be the Before AND After Pics!
What: Someone is seeking a “beautiful woman with a few pounds to lose.” They have a weight-loss system and want to share it with you.
The Good: In the best-case scenario, you’ll drop some pounds. Also, you’ll get a “24 hours gym membership.”
The Bad: That gym membership is the only compensation you will receive. More importantly, never trust anyone who says that “JUST COMMUN SENSE AND WILL POWER” is all you need to lose weight.
