You know what’s better than learning? Learning for FREE. Living in a progressive city does occasionally have its benefits, namely, the fact that tuition to CCSF is free to residents, which means that these classes and others are gratis (barring the occasional materials fee or textbook).
And in the worst-case scenario, your life ends up like that show “Community.” That doesn’t sound so bad, right?
Anyway, we went through the course catalog to find some awesome courses and then provided some color commentary.
Why Aren’t You Poly Yet?: The Class
Believe it or not, fellow Bay Area residents, as recently as last year there were still places in the United States that practiced monogamy. Get 3 credits for learning about this primitive social and sexual construct and the weirdos who believed in it.
The class for naughty girls and boys
Have you been a very, very, very, very, very bad boy/girl? Do you need a spanking? In this class, you will learn how and why subs become subs, and doms become doms.
Attention hepcats
Interested in impressing the flappers with your corking dance moves?
Side note: the lines have begun to blur between hipsters (of yore) and hipsters (present).
Seize the dance moves of production
You know that really popular and really expensive exercise regime that everyone’s talking about? Seize the means of production and learn how to do it (and teach it) yourself. You will also learn to randomly shout “ZUUUUUUUUUUUUUMBA” at the top of your lungs.
Snake conducting
Hiss, hiss! Has your python been naughty? Take this class and I’ll teach you how to control it to slither in the proper dErection. ;-)
[Editor’s note: yes I know it’s a programming language, please appreciate a good pun with me for like 15 seconds before turning into a pedant.]
Ssh, don’t tell anyone I love math
Have you ever wanted to learn math, but didn’t want to let on to your friends that you were a nerd? Be discreet about it by taking this class. Problem sets must be done under the light of the moon and in invisible ink.
[Editor’s note: see previous editor’s note.]
The Sopranos: The Class
Looking to start a legitimate business operation with your famiglia? This class will provide you with all the skills you need to build your laundromat empire.
